Life is screwed

I think I'm just screwing up my own life currently. Wee. I'm just too laid back about studying, cannot even bother to study even if I have a whole lot of free time. So far I've haven't passed any test this year and I think that if I continue at this rate, I might as well just withdraw now since its kind of wasting time, but hey!

I'm still wanting to go for uni right? Right now, I don't even know the answer already. I don't even know why I bother, I persue knowledge, give practical solutions to people who need answers, actually help people in ways, but yet I fail at applying them to myself. Why am I such a noob? :( How many people have I helped? around 5. How many times have I let that slip away from myself? probably more than 5. I wonder why can't I just do it.

Hmm, I can only look from far and observe. Why must the world be so complicated. Stupid side effects of the advancements in technology, blahblah -_- This is so crappy. Interconnected-ness but yet so disconnected. So close yet so far, I really hate it, as if God was playing a prank on me for the 3rd time.

Emo-ness. Stupid trend thats so contagious, I refuse to fall for it, I only will walk by it and laugh at it in the face. But can I really do so? Its already begun taking its toll on me. I guess I thought that I'd already come a long way from my past, but have I really done so? I now think I haven't, I'm just a silly guy who is getting upset over silly things.

Haiz. This time really sad already. Bad news aside. Heres the good news, I still won't cut my wrists! :)

Life has its ups and downs, cheer up for the better day will come, someday, sometime. Far from now, after you've forgotten this. - JQ